Friday Night with College Friends

Me, Teri, Lia, Jewel, Tanya and Och

It might take a while to gather all these girls together in a single photo. Jewel, I will certainly miss you. :(

Also present that night were JV, Miko, Alex and Pao A.

The SMART DRESSER Shop

Hi everyone!

If you happen to drop by my blog, then you might want to visit my online shop. It's called THE SMART DRESSER SHOP.

I am selling clothes and other items for young women professionals at very reasonable prices. I do meet ups and I accept orders for shipment.

Please click here for more info.

EARTH DAY 2008 Schedule of Activities

Mario Panis' Second Solo Painting Exhibit

The opening cocktails will be held on May 9, 2008, Friday, at 6PM in Metro Gallery, P. Guevarra Street, San Juan, Metro Manila (beside Cafe Ysabel).

The exhibit will run until May 18, 2008.

For more info on the artist, you may look him up at http://www.mariopanis.com/.

The Empress Wears New Style

I've been wrongfully accused of fashion crimes one too many times.

When I wore couture shorts to Greenbelt or Fort six months before the Wowowee hosts started wearing them, I was told I'm being promiscuous.

When I bought the first set of skinny jeans arrivals from Mango, I had to brace myself from snapping to an officemate who muttered "fit na fit ang jeans mo ah" after saying "wow! ang sexy" audibly. Four or five months after, she was crazy about purchasing a 350-peso pair from another officemate.

Now that I have been so crazy about high waisted pencil skirts, I get similar comments from people in the office. (Geez... I bought my first high waisted skirt from Prima Linea months before the ASAP girls wore them in the show. And still, to them, I was so 80s. Well, I'm thinking of 50s but if that's what they think, then so be it.)

You're just baduy and outdated, I'd silently say to myself whenever an office jerk would tell me that.

It might be that I'm just being sensitive about it. But the thing is I really get irked whenever a less-fashionable person tells me those things. I would've called it constructive criticism if it comes from someone with a relatively good fashion taste or even from someone with a better fashion sense. But come on! Don't tell me those things when you'll be rushing to the nearest tiangge to buy similar clothes just because you've seen some local icon wear them on a variety show.

It's not that I have negative notions about local icons and variety shows. I watch them and find their hosts pretty. What I am trying to rant about is the attitude of the people I know.

However, putting myself in their grade school boy shoes (hehe), could it be that fashion for the masa (general public) is an acquired taste? Like, could high waisted skirts and skinny jeans be really ugly and it's just the common opinion of fashion trendsetters that make them likeable?

Think of it this way: a decade or more after when our daughters will look at our old pictures, how would they react over our clothes and our dos? Will they laugh at them or will they marvel at them the way we do whenever we see Audrey Hepburn and Jackie O's old pictures?

It may be similar to Hans Christian Andersen's children's story, The Emperor Wears New Clothes. People will say the clothes look great though they really don't--because there were no clothes after all. It just took one naughty kid (who was not taught by his mother to shut up when needed) to point out that the emperor was in fact, naked.

So are the office jerks being the undisciplined kid? And I, do I look like a fool just like the emperor? Are the fashion designers and trendsetters tricking us?

Celebrities are the best advertisers of fashion (and fad). They are the ones who bridge the runway and the street. Their tastes are always the most crucial in popularizing trends. Trends actually start with them and a few other personalities until they are copied by the general public.

I just come somewhere in between. But the thing is, at least I'm not the last copycat.

Love and Weightlessness

This was originally posted in my Multiply blog last March 2007. I am re-posting this in memory of my relationship with the man who gave me the most significant gift in my life.

I have already disposed most of our memorabilia over the past few weeks. Though, of course, I decided to keep some for future purposes.

Anyway, before I start writing something else. Here is Love and Weightlessness, slightly reworked from its original text.

It is quite unthinkable for love and weightlessness to appear in one sentence without any purpose of defining their points of contrast. But tonight, I just realized the unthinkable – that love and weightlessness can, in fact, be put together within a person’s sense of being.

Love without passion, attachment and excitement is weightless.

I used to wonder why holding someone who has been a significant part of my past no longer elicited intense feelings in me. Was it because love has been gone on my part? If this was so, then holding him would have made my heart feel like a bottomless pit – void of any emotion or in other words, empty. But I did not feel any sense of emptiness then. There was, in fact, a certain sense of fullness. And what I felt was similar to the sensation of being unburdened and weightless.

Looking at him in the eye made me search myself and find within me some sort of affection that remains. I still loved him. And the feeling of weightlessness sprang from the fact that I have already let him go. I decided that to love him would mean letting him be who he is and not binding him with the compromises and restrictions that he had to make and live with within our damned relationship. And for me, parting ways with him will give him this freedom.

I realized that to have completely let him go entailed putting out the yearning to be physically and emotionally close to him. When I looked into his eye, I knew then that I still loved him. But I knew at the same time that I could only love him from a distance. I did not feel the need to express my love through talk and deed. It was a love that can be best executed without the range of a relationship.

So, therefore, weightless love is love in its purest form. It is the antithesis of mad love, which pulls us down. Weightless love is love without the burning passion, desire, attachment and excitement. It is the love that lets us be. It is the love that sets us free.

Who are you, Mr. Anonyman?

I have been frequenting the blog of an anonymous man who randomly viewed my Multiply account earlier this April. I do not know how he happened to have chanced upon my Multiply but the thing is, I am engrossed with his writing.

I assume that most of the entries found in Mr. Anonyman's blog were inspired by the women he has had affairs with in his days as a bachelor. He writes them with depth and a queer passion that leaves most of his female readers silently hoping that someone in their history looks back at their affairs the way Mr. Anonyman sees those of his own. Everytime I finish reading Anon's (that's what we call him) post, I find myself asking this same thing over and over again: how come most guys don't think about their affairs this way? How come most guys don't even bother to write about these things?

This plus the mystery behind Anonyman's real persona keeps me anticipating for his new blog entries. He so reminds me of someone existing behind a different pseudonym. Though there may be vast spaces for doubts... But still, how can two different identities have the same preferences and qualities? Is it possible that they share the same personality?

Sigh. I kind of miss the company of that person, especially on lonely sleepless nights like this. It's just funny how one finds depth in the shallowest relationships; how one finds a friend behind a faceless mask.

I wish we could have another one of those lengthy, sensible talks...

Under A Woven Canopy: A Banig Painting Exhibit by Jomike Tejido

My bosses and I got invites from Haribon Foundation to attend the launch of this exhibit. Missed it. But anyway, there's still a lot of time to check Jomike Tejido's banig paintings.

Meanwhile, you may read a backgrounder written by the artist himself. Click here to read it.

Mad About Lashes 2: An Update

I found a very nice feature on lash enhancements over at Shopcrazy. Here's a salon and a product I'm just dying to try.

1. Grace Lagman Salon
...which has been doing lash extensions since the 70s. And for a ultra affordable price of P420(that's as of 2006)

2. Mikaela Growth Conditioner
... which is supposed to make the lashes fuller and longer.

Boo! I can't wait to know more about them. It's 8 AM pa lang in the office and so far nobody from Grace Lagman or Mikaela is answering the phone.

For the meantime,please click here to read the Shopcrazy article.

Lalalalala, time to prettify my lashes once again =p

UPDATE:

I just talked to someone at Philosophy (by Mikaela) and found out more about the wonder product: Mikaela Growth Conditioner.

It's actually a lash treatment formula which can be applied to the lashes through it's mascara-like applicator.

I also found out that women have been swearing on these that's why they are now all out of stock :( New stocks will most likely arrive late this month. Price is something around 1,400 pesos per piece.

Welcome to the Workaday World

Does stability and maturity entail having to live with the monotonous day-to-day activities of the workaday world?

I ask... now that I have found myself in the boat where I wish to stay. (It's not yet a ship but I understand the value of hardwork to let this boat become one great ship.)

I find myself getting close to being depressed out of the lack of will to move. I dare not say that I am no longer interested. I still am. But the thing is the monotony is too imposing that I cannot make myself capable of moving out of the box—in terms of mind and body.

At this point, I wish to make two correlations .

One. Excitement has a direct correlation with novelty.

This is a dangerous fact for someone like me who is usually motivated by excitement. I like brainstorming sessions with peers and with... myself because I find excitement out of all the ideas that come out.

But when these sessions take place on a regular basis and I get to realize that not all great ideas are meant to happen, that's when all the excitement and motivation has dwindled.

Two. One's relationship with her career is similar to that with her boyfriend.

One must fall in love and stay in love. But staying in love is completely impossible to most couples in long term relationships. There are times when we start to feel as if we have lost our individuality because of being so much identified with our partners. Or we feel like the romance has faded, i.e. we tend to do the same things over and over again as a couple. Makes me think: if couples need some time apart to deal with their own individual problems, does this also apply to those with an employee-employer relationship?

This is actually where I am. It has just been 8 months and now I'm feeling this way. I honestly feel like I'm so sucked out of life. It's like I get up in the morning to primp myself up... making sure that I don't miss my SPF 30 sun block and eye cream and Kerastase serum before and after I set my hair. I leave the house at 6:30 am and feel like dying out of the same old songs playing on my iPod. I arrive at work to have breakfast and coffee, brush my teeth, put lipstick (even when nobody will really see me). I check e-mails, tick off tasks in my to-do lists, attend a bunch of meetings, meet with suppliers and whoevers and lastly, turn my computer off at 6 pm. I straighten my desk and myself to get ready for my sundo to pick me up at around 6:30. Then I try to entertain myself for an hour of travel. Of course, I look forward to holding my little girl close to me with her giggling and making her usual pa-cute gestures; completely innocent of what goes on inside her mother's head. But when I arrive home, I'm usually too tired to savor such moments or too stressed about dealing with household help who loses—if not stains or damages, my good underwear or the clothes that I feel like wearing for the next day.

Sometimes tantrums erupt out of me and ruin the peace and quiet of the whole house. And there, I feel like I lose all the peace and goodness in me.

I say things I do not really intend to say. I hurt people I love (and even came to love) in the process.

I lose the motivation to perform my role as someone who practices development and touches lives simply because I do not wish to become a hypocrite.

Five minutes ago, I just felt so bad for declining an employee's request for consideration to the scholarship program. I know how hard it is for them to send children to school, lalo na I know how hard it is to keep a family financially.

Well, they have not met the requirements.

But still I felt bad.

Even depressed.

And it's so much worse when I feel like I haven't been that good to the persons who I care more about. But you see, because they're so much closer, they have an easier access to my personal space. Correction: they have an easier way to trespass my personal space. And I? My knee-jerk reaction is to BARK! This, of course, as I have found out after a gazillion episodes of trespassing, has never been helpful.

I have a plan of action for this. But I'd rather not write about it.

I am so dead.

Hopefully, there's a sequel to be posted soon.

Goin' Wild Wild West

Just sharing some pictures taken during our day trip to El Kabayo at Clark Field Zone, Pampanga.

There isn't much to see and do aside from riding the horses and eating steak at The Unicorn Saloon. But anyway, to those who might chance upon my blog as a result of searching Google, let me share with you a few basic FYIs.

1. Horseback riding is P350 for 30 minutes. The guides are nice. You can look for Among (his real name's Ciriaco just in case I got his nick wrong), our very nice guide.
2. Lessons are P650 per hour.
3. Prices of the food at The Unicorn Saloon are super affordable. There are steak orders, good for a group of 4, which are just P499.

Unicorn Saloon did not have airconditioning but the fan was good enough not to let us sweat while eating. (Makes you feel as if you're really in Texas or something.) The steak were so-so and the service was okay. The only disappointment was the Brown Beans we ordered. We were expecting real cowboy beans and not Hunt's Pork & Beans without the pork. But that's what we got. Anyway, the fries were okay so there, Unicorn's forgiven.

The last highlight of the day was buying groceries at Pure Gold. I found myself stacking our cart with one good after another, especially with toiletries, chocolates and fresh fruit juice bottles. I also saw a lot of fake-looking La Coste items being sold in one of the shops. The bags would have been nice for their price but still, I saw some loosely stitched threads so I didn't buy anything.

Some insights on Gracia Burnham's In the Presence of My Enemies

I just finished reading In the Presence of My Enemies which tells Gracia Burnham's experience as a hostage in the hands of Abu Sayyaf terrorists.

Aside from getting me teary-eyed towards the end (when she recounts how Martin died and the story that follows after that), the book made me think about God's plan for all of us.

Most of the time--especially in the face of adversities, we just do not seem to understand God's purpose for giving us such hard trials. We usually resort to blaming ourselves for making decisions that lead us to the situation and, more often that not, we accuse Him of not loving us enough to give us the kind of life we've always wanted.

There was a part at the end of the book when Gracia asks why she only got half of her prayers answered when she have been praying really hard along with thousands of people all over the world. Weren't their prayers enough?

I guess God has plans for us that are beyond our will. Yes, it has never been easy to make ourselves servants of God. But if we let ourselves accept that "thy will be done," then it will be easier for us to accept and let God unravel His plan before our very eyes.

I admire the Burnhams for their unwavering faith and strength in the face of terror. It's just sad that for someone who had deep faith like Martin, he just had to die like that. If I were Gracia or anyone with a firsthand encounter of the Burnhams, I would've expected him to come out alive or at least, die dramatically. But Martin's death was so sudden and senseless that I find no justice for everything that he has put through in a year of captivity.

In the end, what matters most is Martin's faith and how this faith has kept Gracia and all the others strong. It is the faith that converted Guillermo before he faced his tragic death and it is also the same faith which may have changed the lives of many people all over the world.

I guess Martin's purpose in God's plan is to set an example of faith in the face of the hardest circumstances. And Gracia had to come out alive to tell the world about this man and his faith.

* * *

P.S. I pity the those who suffer because of ignorance and injustice. The Abu Sayyaf are suffering spiritually because of their ignorance or at least, they're being misinformed as seen in Gracia's story. And I kind of feel bad for the soldiers for the injustices that many of them go through in the hands of their own generals. Again, as seen in Gracia' story.

Quoted: I miss this place because I miss someone

I dedicate the whole stretch to the memories of my lost youth, the happy beings who spent a significant part of their lives in it, you and what I wish we could have been.

Someone who cannot be named once wrote, "I miss this place because I miss someone."

Same here.

I miss you though I don't have the license to.

And I know it's insane to be feeling this way when you're like history trying to be re-lived and when to you, I was nothing but a convenient option; at times, even your last resort.

It's insane because I have never loved you. It's just that you remind me so much of who I was before I was given this huge responsibility which I willingly embraced.

You know, I was crazy about you.

Sometimes, I still get to that point after a day or an evening of togetherness.

Those were just a few hours but for me, they're just enough to let the old memories come pouring in and flooding my senses.

To the boy in my Neverland, this is for you.

Background Music: 90s Alternative Playlist
(Think: Blind Melon, Toad the Wet Sprocket, Matchbox 20, Soul Asylum, Hootie and the Blowfish, etc.)

Is this your house?

Well, Google is getting scarier by the day for stalkers =D

Oops! I'm not saying you're one.

Blair Waldorf is my favorite Gossip Girl

Pretty, classy and definitely with a great style!

(Doesn't she look a bit like Natalie Portman and our very own Pinay beauties, Georgina Wilson and Kat Alano?)

Anyway, I just spotted some Blair-like headbands being sold at Salsatrends in The Ramp for only 200 bucks.

Care to steal Blair's look?

Spankin' Sexy Lace-up Babies

Been sleepless because of the Steve Madden Reilly. Checked if they're available na at Rustan's but wala pa din. I almost bought them online last night but I got afraid to enter my credit card details since some fields of the checkout form were blinking and changing (my location specifically).

I wanted to buy the Reilly in this color since I figured I only have around four office shoes with a brown tone.


Product Details:
This lace up bootie is accented with patent trim and eyelet details.
4 inch heel
Fabric and patent upper
Synthetic sole

This is how the black version looks like:



And, these, I saw at The Ramp during lunchtime.

I don't really like this color but you should see the black and white version. I tried them on and they're so spankin' sexy!

Anyway, will post the pic after I buy it tomorrow =p

But for the meantime, feast your eyes on these L.A.M.B. booties. They kind of look similar:




P.S. I have to dig up some oldie but goodie oxfor pumps now that they're hot once again.